Final goodbyes..... Sometimes, saying goodbye for that final time is the hardest thing to say. We lost one of my favorite people in the world this week, and even though I know the last year of his life was in no way, shape or form the way he would have wanted to live, and he is better off now, it was still hard to let go. This man was my father in law. He was my husbands stepfather for almost 30 years, and a boy could not have asked for his mom to find a better dad for him than this man was to my husband. His real dad is still alive, and in no way am I trying to take away his role as a dad, but JR was the one who taught my husband to enjoy the out of doors and the one who helped shape him into the man I married. He was the kindest, most gentle man I have ever known in my life. He was the type of person who would do anything for anyone. One of my earliest memories of his goodness was the first year Mark and I were married. I worked with a single mom of 2, ages about 4 and 6, I think. Well, my father in law found out about how rough a time this gal was having it, so he went shopping. He bought those 2 kids several Christmas gifts and asked me to deliver them and when and if I was asked where they came from, I was to simply say they came from Santa Claus. This man did not know these kids or their mom, but he was just such a good man, that he did this for the children. I knew he was a good man, and I loved him from the beginning, but this act put him over the top of my list of great people. I hope he knew how much we all loved and appreciated him. I have missed him for the last year. I feel tremendous guilt for not having visited him in the home any more often than I did, but I truly believe that the last few times I did visit him, he was already gone. He didn't know who I was, and that made it so hard, that if I am truly honest with myself, I will admit that that is why I didn't go any more often than I did. I would love to blame my job and lack of time, but I should have made more time. I will always regret that. I am grateful for the many wonderful memories I do have of him, though. I am thankful that the last words we spoke to one another were "I Love You". And I am extremely glad that we took Caleb over to see him at least this one time and got this picture of the 2 of them together. It is a picture I will treasure always and forever. And we will tell Caleb and his baby brother or sister of the great Grandpa they never knew, but one who was loved and respected by all who knew him. Thank You, God, for letting this man be in my life the last 25 years, and I know I will see him again one day! Friday, March 21, 2008
Final goodbyes..... Sometimes, saying goodbye for that final time is the hardest thing to say. We lost one of my favorite people in the world this week, and even though I know the last year of his life was in no way, shape or form the way he would have wanted to live, and he is better off now, it was still hard to let go. This man was my father in law. He was my husbands stepfather for almost 30 years, and a boy could not have asked for his mom to find a better dad for him than this man was to my husband. His real dad is still alive, and in no way am I trying to take away his role as a dad, but JR was the one who taught my husband to enjoy the out of doors and the one who helped shape him into the man I married. He was the kindest, most gentle man I have ever known in my life. He was the type of person who would do anything for anyone. One of my earliest memories of his goodness was the first year Mark and I were married. I worked with a single mom of 2, ages about 4 and 6, I think. Well, my father in law found out about how rough a time this gal was having it, so he went shopping. He bought those 2 kids several Christmas gifts and asked me to deliver them and when and if I was asked where they came from, I was to simply say they came from Santa Claus. This man did not know these kids or their mom, but he was just such a good man, that he did this for the children. I knew he was a good man, and I loved him from the beginning, but this act put him over the top of my list of great people. I hope he knew how much we all loved and appreciated him. I have missed him for the last year. I feel tremendous guilt for not having visited him in the home any more often than I did, but I truly believe that the last few times I did visit him, he was already gone. He didn't know who I was, and that made it so hard, that if I am truly honest with myself, I will admit that that is why I didn't go any more often than I did. I would love to blame my job and lack of time, but I should have made more time. I will always regret that. I am grateful for the many wonderful memories I do have of him, though. I am thankful that the last words we spoke to one another were "I Love You". And I am extremely glad that we took Caleb over to see him at least this one time and got this picture of the 2 of them together. It is a picture I will treasure always and forever. And we will tell Caleb and his baby brother or sister of the great Grandpa they never knew, but one who was loved and respected by all who knew him. Thank You, God, for letting this man be in my life the last 25 years, and I know I will see him again one day! 
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4 comments:
Ann, What a loving tribute! Has your husband heard Brad Paisley's song 'He Didn't Have To Be'? Its one of my favorite...we are adoptive parents and this applies to my husband as well. I get misty eyed everytime I hear it. Here is a link to it in a video clip on You Tube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVFmHHxXCVg
Please print your blog entry and put it with your memorbilia, it was a very loving tribute.
Many hugs...and please remember, that memories last forever.
Very nice rememberances, sews. :) And what a great picture for Caleb to have, too.
Ann,
You wrote a loving tribute that celebrates the essence of someone who was dearly loved. It must have been difficult to write. It is hard to lose the ones you love- especially when our loved ones have an illness that changes them. My mother in law has Alzheimer's and it is hard to watch the changes that have happened to a vital and smart woman. May you find comfort from the love that you all shared for 25+ years. I am sure that he would have valued the love,laughter, caring and support that you have brought to your husband and your children.
My condolences to you and your family at this difficult time,
Regards from a Western Canadian Quilter,
Anna
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